The Dhannnsarii Zone
I open my eyes and find myself in a clinically neat room. I find my hand is resting on my cr**ch and move it away in disgust. I see a huge 4 by 2 mirror on the wall .This is not my room. I walk to the mirror and am shocked to be confronted by the bloated, mishappen shape that is known to most of UG1 as Pondy. I scream and stop in disgust upon hearing the voice that comes out. Its nasal, whiny and resonates in my head . Wait, the thoughts in my head still are mine .But for how long??
I realize there's an assignment to be finished. They could not spare us in the holidays either ,could they?? .I see what time it is in my wristwatch and see its 10A.M and wonder what Pondy is doin in my body (Ive seen enough movies to know thats how it works).
I head for the lab .All through the way ,Im confronted with frowns and filthy sideway looks(except for rangeela, who winks at me).It is not surprising ,when I really think about it. I am Pondy for now,concentrate on the assignment .
I am inexplicably drawn to the EC lab. I give in to the urge to enter,and see JNT smiling leeringly at me. He says he needs to speak to me. I go to his cubicle ,and he opens multisim and starts explaining why it is wrong and how nobody believes him. He was baring his soul to me, babbling about how I was the only person who believed in him and went on and on and somewhere within the smouldering repulsion,I felt a twinge of affection .It started as a thought,but the next thing I knew ,I was facing him ,my hand on his shoulder and was drawing myself closer to him.
I came to my senses a few inches away from his face and ran out of the lab.
This cannot be happening .Am I becoming him (?) ?? Is he(?) becoming more like me too?? where will this end??? I hurry to the hostel.Ive got to find myself and sort this out. All the way back to the hostel .I catch myself staring at a senior wearing a short jammies.
this is not happening.Im trapped in Pondy.
to be continued............
year two
YEEAAAAHH,thats right.
In two more days,we are officially done with the first year and we'll be seniors when we're back in this place.
And.. i hear the 3rd sem is one 3month-long siesta. I found the time to write this cuz M.B.Srinivas ,our enigmantic E.C.prof literally cancelled the lab exam cuz all we gotta do is write the apparatus ,procedure and alla that without so much as touching a wire. Thank you sir.I so entirely forgive you for the f**ked up manner in which this course went down.
Looking back ,This sem was one fiasco followed by another. It started off with a bang with Jawahar and the new kid on the block Anoop teaching DSA and it looked quite promising.Then came the winter vacations that entirely screwed up my antenna,veering it back to the laze around all day mode. Back and we had the assgn 1 .Jawahar freaked everybody out by the whole confession thing.Lets get real guys, anyone who was'nt a taker was a giver.
Before we knew it, the midsems were the next day . Do not get me started on them. Sure ,felicity went down quite well, but right before we could lick our wounds ,the next Midsems were right up our noses.
And the one that topped it all ,the CO fiasco.Thats one for the papers God forbid.Makes you think,how could the CO tutors be so naive? I mean No totals ?? What were they thinking??? Or ,were they thinking???N.B.Everybody who could copy did. And those who did not,yours truly included kicked themselves later for not.That was until Pasha's outraged mail(Prashant Gopal,to the uninitiated).But ,when all the pieces have finally fallen in place,I think an F is downright horrible.
To those of you who donot know what F means: it means you have got to repeat the course and pass, and yet the F stays right there. I believe that repeating the whole course is bad enough,especially because I believe only a fourth of the grand total were caught. The endsems were quite uneventful.
All in all ,this was one f***ed up Sem.I hope the Juniors dont have it this bad.
The saurabh Conundrum
Dear readers,
those who know me will attest to the fact that I,Venkata Raghuram Rayapureddi , am a man of few vices and many flaws.These would include a disposition that annoying enough to drive most men over the edge, a kind of manic persistence that borders on insane ,and a generous use of gratituous profanity .These and a few more to be ironed out before I become one with the universe. I have annoyed too many a classmate(N.B its entirely unintentional,always is),pissed of a few only to follow them around apologising profusely until they give in.(Hey, its a known disorder called Human Doormat syndrome, look it up.)
I just want to be at good terms with everybody. Its a part of my grand plan for eventual world domination
(sorry ,bad one.).But the second of the afore-mentioned contingencies fail me in the case of a particular Messr.Saurabh Aggarwal. I ticked him off last sem over a prolonged period(the whole last sem) by sleeping right through every single class right next to him. Somewhere down the line ,He just snapped and blew the gasket an revoked my permission to sit beside his august self.I was all "What's up your a**??".In fact that was all I said.He went straight to Satyagraha mode (righteous rage,to the uninitiated) and never spoke to me ever again. In fact ,today ,one of the last few days of the second sem(i.e a whole six months after the aforesaid incident) ,he still acts mean when I casually asks what the CO portion is??
I mean,what what kind of an answer is "I dont know??" form a stereotypical slogger who stayed not just awake ,but fully conscious through every second of every CO class there was??
I was shocked out of my wits .I totally did NOT see that one coming .He was always kinda taciturn when I was around but I did not know it was silent rage. It totally creeeps me out that anyone could hold a grudge for this looong. God knows what he'd be like if someone reallly gets his goat. My prayers are with that poor bastard.
What really bothers me is that ,we were kinda chummy for starters ,like we'd talk about the matrix and LOTR(Saurabh always chose to ignore the existence of all other works of fiction) an Id show him my art and he'd smile or grunt(approval or dispproval respectively) and we'd talk about computer games (My lack of any knowledge in that field would infuriate him into a teaching frenzy.).I always kinda liked him for hard he was trying to be at par with everything while the rest of us were content with our defeatist rhetorics. I want all of that back.
So saurabh if you are reading this ,I am really sorry for pissing you off.I wanna be friends again .
Wow.That was heartfelt and mushy.
For the rest of you : did you know that impotency stikes one in ten men.So dont sweat it dude.Odds are, one of your buddies cany get it up either.
Ragdoll-Signing out.
